It is not uncommon for children to experience a little back-to-school anxiety. Summer break is coming to an end, the seasons are about to change, and a new year of school is ahead of them. The first couple weeks of school their teachers are going over syllabi and setting expectations for the year, which can be overwhelming for any child. If mid-September doesn’t seem to provide relief, then your child might have school anxiety. Below are some changes to look out for both physically and behaviorally. The behaviors you will notice at home may be different from what teachers are experiencing, so it’s worth making that distinction here.
Physically
- Anxiety comes along with a ton of different physically symptoms, such as hands sweating, chest tightening, jaw clenching, butterflies in stomach, and more. The most common I’ve seen in kids and teens with school anxiety is stomachaches, headaches, and digestive concerns.
- Symptoms tend to get worse on school nights, the morning before school, and/or on Sundays. If your child seems to really be struggling it is important to take them to do the doctor to rule out physical illness before concluding it is school anxiety.
- Similarly, they might be making more frequent trips to the nurse while in school and, if they are allowed to have their phone on them, you could be getting texts asking to come home during the school day.
- Typically, these symptoms will alleviate almost entirely on Friday nights and Saturdays given that school isn’t the next morning.
Behaviorally (at home)
- Your child becomes more emotionally reactive when you bring up school. Asking them if they’ve finished their homework or how their school day went might result in a total melt down.
- They will likely avoid talking about school all together, or only focus on the negative aspects of school.
- Procrastinating on homework is another sign, along with difficulty staying focused on their homework or other school related tasks.
- They may spend extra time trying to perfect their homework and become emotionally reactive because of it. This can be present with or without procrastination.
- You might expect temper tantrums in the morning before school as a means to avoid going
- They might become extra clingy with you when leaving for school if they’re younger in age.
- Increase in power struggles with your child or little arguments that they struggle to move on from, and more fights with siblings during the week.
- Friday evening and Saturday’s will typically provide relief for your child and you may notice these are “better days” for them.
Behaviorally (At school)
It’s hard to know what’s going on at school unless you’ve recently had parent-teacher conferences, but you can reach out to the teacher at any time to inquire.
- Your child might not be turning in the homework consistently or forget to complete their homework.
- They might be getting into more trouble in school and becoming more disruptive. Anxious feelings need to find a way out and disruptive behavior can be that outlet, similar to increased arguing with family at home.
- Your child might be going to the nurse frequently (2 or more visits in one week) and trying to get out of social hours like gym or lunch by going to the library or elsewhere.
- Teachers might notice a decrease in participation if they’ve had the student before, otherwise they might think your child isn’t paying attention in class overall.
It’s important to know that unless you specifically ask the teachers if they’re noticing the above behaviors the teacher may not consider them concerning. School anxiety behaviors can also look like a learning disorder or ADHD to teachers if they don’t have experience with it, understandably so.
There are other disorders that can mimic school anxiety, such as separation anxiety, generalized anxiety, OCD, specific phobias, selective mutism, and school refusal. This post is not a diagnostic tool, so be sure to ask more questions and have your child evaluated by a mental health professional if any of the above rings true for your child or teen and they can assist you in differentiating between the possible diagonses.
Reach out for a free 15-minute consultation if you have any questions about your child’s behavior and how therapy can help!
Be well.
